I agree. And that’s why I opened with a whole paragraph against callout culture, and spoke against virtue-signaling. Calling someone a bigot just creates offense.
What I was proposing, which I consider a good mile different, is that we talk about behaviors, actions being bigoted or entitled or otherwise problematic. And that we avoid the “you shoulds” in favor of the “have you considered, though…?”
In terms of the spinach exercise proposed by Jay Smooth:
Spinach is objective. To some extent. Based on your personal self-examination. It’s subjective in the sense that you might not want to go check. You might not open your mouth wide enough to see. You might miss it.
Prejudice works the same way. One would have to open one’s entitlement wide enough to take a good look. One would have to be willing to go check. One would have to have the humility and introspection, and self-awareness, to do an accurate scan.
And, having checked, one could still think, “nah, all good.”
It’s an individual thing.