I of course see things from my perspective, and you see them from yours. Dialog is intended to expand both perspectives, hopefully find some commonality.
I really do not believe at any point was I intending to “force” anyone to accept trans women. We are a very marginalized minority, as you point out, and we have little agency on society — as demonstrated by the current U.S. administration’s draconian laws against us.
By “this is not how it works,” I mean that it is not on trans women — the most marginalized minority — to be the “allies of women”. For two reasons: a. these are not two separate groups — the group “women” encompasses the subgroup “trans women,” and b. the larger, more privileged group should be a good ally of the smaller, more challenged subgroup. That’s how solidarity works.
In terms of “you can’t push your way in,” and “you can’t win acceptance by being jerks,” please see: ANY human rights movement in the history of humanity.
However, I did go out of my way in my piece to promote “not being jerks,” I am disheartened you didn’t notice.